Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
