so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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