just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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