she looked like the before picture.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
