I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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