If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
how can u be prego again
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Randomize