I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
