I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
