I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
