yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
