Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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