is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Boobs speak an international language.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
