Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
