lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
