I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
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I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
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By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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