My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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