I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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