you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
My vagina is officially offended.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
