I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
my liver is dry heaving
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
