And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
