what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Randomize
