Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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