we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
