I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
