i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize