I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize