maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
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If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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