he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
drinking out of a sandbucket again
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I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
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Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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