Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize