Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize