She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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