found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
