In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
