this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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