maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
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