can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
