He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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