wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I met the friendliest cop last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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