You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
