There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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