Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
