i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
