haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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