super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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