I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
as a side note pls kill me
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
