why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
