One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
May the power of my ass compel you!!
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Randomize
