i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
No subtext here. People are naked.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
