We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
