try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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