My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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