Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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